Book Review:
The Rules: Time-Tested Secrets for Capturing the Heart of Mr. Right
Author: Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider
Country: USA
Language: English
Subject(s): Relationships, Dating
Genre(s): Self-help
Publisher: Grand Central Publishing,(Warner Books)
Publication date: 1995-02-14
Media type: Print
Pages: 192
ISBN: 0-446-51813-1
The Rules: Time-Tested Secrets for Capturing the Heart of Mr. Right is a best-selling 1995 book co-authored by Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider.
The Rules are predicated on the author's thesis that men are thrillseekers engaged by a hunting instinct.[3] While they seem mostly about "playing hard to get", they are also about training men, like for example rule 7. This seems more into changing his behaviour, than anything else. [7] Some of the Rules seem strongly culturally biased. For example, in Scandinavia, Germany and the Netherlands, women would generally feel that following rule 4 (not paying for the date) and 12 (expecting gifts) are putting her in debt with the man. Some women in these cultures might even consider following these rules tantamount to prostitution, and believe that costs for the first two or three dates should surely be split, so as not to create unwanted expectations. This stands in contrasts to other cultures as in North America and southern Europe, where women might expect the man to pay for her.
01: Be a “Creature” Unlike Any Other
02: Don't Talk to a Man First (and Don't Ask Him to Dance)
03: Don't Stare at Men or Talk Too Much
04: Don't Meet Him Halfway or Go Dutch on a Date
05: Don't Call Him & Rarely Return His Calls[3]
06: Always End Phone Calls and dates First
07: Don't Accept a Saturday Night Date after Wednesday
08: Fill Up Your Time before the Date
09: How to Act on Dates 1,2, & 3 End the date first especially if you like him.
10: How to Act on Dates 4 through Commitment Time
11: Always end the date first
12: Stop Dating Him if He Doesn't Buy You a Romantic Gift for Your Birthday or Valentine's Day
13: Don’t See Him More than Once or Twice a Week
14: No More than Casual Kissing on the First Date
15: Don't Rush into Sex & Other Rules for Intimacy
16: Don't Tell Him What to Do
17: Let Him Take the Lead[3]
18: Don't Expect a Man to Change or Try to Change Him
19: Don’t Open Up Too Fast
20: Be Honest but Mysterious[3]
21: Accentuate the Positive & Other Rules for Personal Ads
22: Don’t Live with a Man (or Leave Your Things in His Apartment)
23: Don't Date a Married Man
24: Slowly Involve Him in Your Family & Other Rules for Women with Children
25: Practice, Practice, Practice! (or, Getting Good at The Rules)
26: Even if You're Engaged or Married, You Still Need The Rules
27: Do The Rules, Even when Your Friends & Parents Think It's Nuts
28: Be Smart and Other Rules for Dating in High School
29: Take Care of Yourself and Other Rules for Dating in College
30: NEXT! & Other Rules for Dealing with Rejection
31: Don't Discuss The Rules with Your Therapist.[3]
32: Rules May Be Pulled Out of Thin Air If the Situation Requires
33: Do The Rules and You’ll Live Happily Ever After!
34: Love Only Those Who Love You
35: Be Easy to Live With
